Aside from picking out a venue, the second most tedious and time consuming part about wedding planning is choosing your guests, and by that I mean your parents guests too.
Okay so is it just me or parents (mothers) have a secret list of friends who show up when you are planning the wedding? Ha!
I can't speak to other cultures but in my Ghanaian culture the bride's family is responsible for a major part of the ceremony, which sometimes translates in some mothers heads that its their wedding all over again lolol. BTW Mothers are awesome and very proud of their children, they have your back at all times especially mine, I love that queen and she already knows how I feel about THE guest list!
So if you didn't already know, the pride and joy of being a mom is witnessing your child marrying the man/woman of their dreams and bringing you grand children. AND another part of the joy is inviting the whole America to witness the union. Don't be mad because its kinda their parental right, rather sit them down and respectfully explain to them your budget and what you want BUT don't deny your folks their guest privileges.
P.S. African parents don't take that lightly because you just may not get married! Just saying!!!
So how then do you put the list together? It will be nice to invite everyone you know to your wedding if you can afford it but its not always the case. My aunty always says 'if I haven't spoken to you in a while (like in a year) then forget it'! It doesn't mean I don't like you, but my budget may just be doing the talking for me at that point, and if you are not that close to someone or haven't spoken to them in a while don't be offended when they don't invite you, be happy for them. We need to respect people's decision no matter what! Common courtesy is,'Don't show up to weddings you were not invited to, its disrespectful and embarrassing' (Unless the couple otherwise specifies, for example all church members are invited, all facebook friends are invited).
Most of the time the couple know exactly who they will invite especially when they are on a budget. You should begin with the family members, then close friends, colleagues and some acquaintances. And we all have that one or two friends we talk to for hours once a year but still wouldn't let them miss any of our special occasions. Those one's are called tight ends.You need them!
Remember you cannot please everyone or afford to cater for everyone you know but there are some people you would definitely love to share those happy memories with and that is okay!. Believe it or not some people may never speak to you after the wedding and your decision will impact friendships so make it wisely. After all, its YOUR big day and YOUR money, hence YOUR chosen guests.
DISCLAIMER: It’s your day, your choice, this is just my ✌🏾cents from experience and being a boss planner :)
-The Boss Planner